There was a lot of info dumping. When we used to talk on the phone.
I’m sorry. I was still young. Frontal lobe not yet developed.
You don’t still do those things do you?
I was trying to tell you about my childhood and teenage years for you to understand me.
Time and place. You need to tell me those sorts of things face to face. It sounded very scary to me on the phone. I can’t see your eyes, I can’t feel your heartbeat.
Okay. So I won’t try to talk about those kinds of things over the phone. Not even video calls these days.
Yeah… it’s not the kinds of topics for long distance communication.
When is the right time to talk about them?
I don’t know… not after making love either. It’s too heavy.
Hmmm…
Maybe if we go for a walk or a picnic… reminiscing and it comes up…
I could just keep it to myself the rest of my life. I’m used to it now.
No… I don’t want u to do that either.
I wasn’t equipped back then to tell u, “That’s a lot of info dumping for an over the phone conversation….”
I didn’t even understand the concept, of info dumping. It’s like all this new gen z vocabulary.
They got it from family psychologists.
Well… it’s more common than people like to admit.
That’s why you suddenly went cold, you wanted to stay friends?
It was really hard to process….. I barely even knew myself back then.
I can see that now…
I was desperately trying to connect with you…
We were already connected…
But you pushed me away after that…
Why didn’t you take it as a sign that we were incompatible?
Why didn’t you try to find someone else who would listen to all that?
I don’t feel comfortable to talk about any of that with anyone else but you.
Surely there are other friends…
(Shaking his head)…
I still need time. Even now. Because I’ve only just remembered… it’s 5:00 am. I woke up from a really weird dream involving Bella Hadid… and then I just… remembered, suddenly…
Bella Hadid? 😅
I think it was from watching Uglies movie last night. My subconscious has stored Bella Hadid as being crowned “the most beautiful face in the world” — I forgot by who, but she had that title…
Right… so she’s the beauty standard?
There was a lot of other stuff in that dream… even some past coworkers…
Why did u want to tell me that over the phone that day?
I dunno… I felt like I could tell u anything and it was just a random thought in my mind… I just blurted it out. Which I don’t do with anyone else! 😳🥺
Subconsciously…?
Maybe I was trying to ask, “Will u still love me no matter what?”
But then my answer, all my actions, is, no. There’s a line. If u cross it, I can’t love u like that.
U can’t love… a demon…
I can’t…
I love you when you’re human…
I don’t even feel attracted to you when you’re an Angel 👼
The polar opposite. Fernando.
I don’t find him attractive when he does all that.
I don’t mind it.
It’s not as scary as a demon.
But it’s not a romantic attraction…
Hmm… u’ve never been a demon?
If I remember it I’ll tell u but I can’t think of anything specific right now…
I guess I’ve been a bully…
A bully?
Yes. In primary school. Some kids were teasing other kids. I joined in.
Ugh, that’s not demon behaviour…
I don’t think u were a demon either, it’s the way u told me that story that set u up like a demon… LIKE a demon… but u weren’t actually a demon…
🥹… what…?
It’s the WAY u told the story.
U were so theatrical.
Ur too good of an actor, even a voice actor. U were setting up a scene.
But I couldn’t see your eyes.
I couldn’t feel your heartbeat.
How can I tell u a story while ur looking into my eyes and feeling my heartbeat?
Face to face, with my palm on your chest.
Oh……. 😳….
What?
I dunno I’m kinda embarrassed now that I didn’t think of that at the time.
We were both so young.
So… info dumping is not suitable for long distance relationships…
Not for me. Maybe it works for other couples but I can’t process it.
I want to…
Look into my eyes and feel my heartbeat.
YES.
Okay. I get it now.
That’s a relief…
Virgo Sun Pisces Moon 