Babe…
Yes, my love?!?!?! What’s up?!?!?!?!
Nothing urgent… lol… I was just having a conversation with Mum…
Ooohh… do tell…. (Ready to take notes)…
Hahahahaha…
Umm… I was asking her, because she was complaining about Doctors in Australia — it’s hard to find bulk billing these days.
Uhuh…
So I said, “What if I had a husband who was rich enough to offer to pay for all your medical bills? Would you accept his help?”
And then she laughed and said, “Of course!!! If you can find a husband like that!!!”
(Chuckles)… okay… (making notes…)
Anyway, then I said, “Are you SURE?!?!?!”
And she said, “He has to offer. I don’t want to have to ask. HE has to OFFER. You can’t be like, a man waiting for your mother-in-law to ASK for help. He has to OFFER to help, before I even need to ask.”
Oh… I see….
Yes, if you have the financial ability, you have to offer to help, first.
Okay! (Smiling!!!)
Then I said, “What if it’s not medical bills. What if he’s like, okay you want to eat organic food, then I’ll pay for whatever organic groceries you want. You don’t have to worry about how expensive organic food is ever again.” And she was like, “Yes, that’s fine. I would accept that. That’s a very nice son-in-law…”
(Chuckles)…
And THEN she asked, “How rich is this man that you’re planning to marry?! He can’t be as rich as your other acquaintance who married the NFL Player!”
WHAT?!?!?!?!!?!?!?!?!?!
THAT WAS MY REACTION AS WELL!!! “WHAT NFL PLAYER?!?!?!?!?!?”
Mum: “Didn’t I tell you about this?! You have an acquaintance who married an American NFL player!!!”
Me — thinking to myself — You mean that all this time I’ve been ACQUAINTANCES with TAYLOR SWIFT AND TRAVIS KELCE via some random other AMERICAN NFL PLAYER WHO’S MARRIED TO A LADY WHO IS AN ACQUAINTANCE OF MINE?!?!?!?!?!?!?!
(Lololololololololololol)…………… WHICH NFL PLAYER?!?!!?! WHO IS HE?!?!?!?!?!
That is the mystery, my love…
(Chuckles)…
But he’s obviously doing quite well. And Mum cannot fathom that I would be dating a man who is WEALTHIER than the AMERICAN NFL PLAYER — who the fuck would I be dating that would be richer than THAT?!?!?!?!
(Chuckles)…. (Quickly googling NFL salaries……)
What is it?
I don’t know, it’s hard to calculate… is he known?! Is he on a winning team?! Does he have brand deals?!?!?!
Again — another mystery. We don’t get to know. And the fictional blog’s reader audience certainly also doesn’t get to know.
Let’s just say… hypothetically — he’s in a Top 5 team?
Ummm…. (shy…..)…. I’m not as rich as the NFL Player…………… (shyyyyy)………..
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ^0^
Daymn!!!!! — (feeling HUMBLED!!!!!!!)
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ^0^
(Giggles)…
This is highly amusing to you…
It kind of is, yeah… (more giggles)…
(SIGH)… well, I’m not TRAVIS KELCE…
Neither is the guy!!!
And it’s okay my love. Anyway, shall I continue my mother and I’s conversation story?
(Nodding, accepting)…
Anyway… so then I was like, “Remember when you used to say you wished that you could live in a granny flat if I married a rich man that could build us a big house and do all that? Do you still want that?”
And she said, “Yes!!! I do!!!”
(Smiles)…
Okay — you’re not an NFL player but you can still afford that, right?
(Nodding, smiling)…
Okay then! That’s all. That was the little story for this evening.
(Hysterical giggling)…
Why are you suddenly giggling about this?!?!?!
I don’t know, it’s kinda funny…
Yeah…?
Will we ever get to meet the acquaintance and the NFL player?
I don’t think so… I am really not that close… she really is an acquaintance… it’s very rare that we’ll cross paths. We wouldn’t intentionally say, “Let’s catch up for a coffee if I’m ever in America!” — it’s not that kind of friendship at all.
(Nodding, accepting)… okay then, nevermind.
Yeah. Nevermind. It’s not a big deal…
Are you sure?!?!?! It seems like your mother has kept that one in her brain for a while!!!
LOL — I don’t even know how that just POPPED OUT — seriously — I don’t remember her ever mentioning it before. Or maybe she did but I didn’t care because I hadn’t cared about NFL yet because Taylor Swift wasn’t dating Travis Kelce YET — when this acquaintance married the NFL player!!!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHA — SO YOU ONLY CARED AFTER TAYLOR STARTED DATING TRAVIS!!!
Of course?!?!?!?!?!
(Hysterical giggles!!!)
Virgo Sun Pisces Moon 