(Sigh)…
(Holds her hands in his hands…) Tell me… what fears?
(Sigh)… Sometimes… women have told each other… “Oh, he grew distant after the marriage…”
(Shaking his head)… I’m not gonna do that…
Sometimes… they say, “Oh, he’s disassociated. It’s like I’m married to a robot. He just eats breakfast, goes to work, comes home, eats dinner — he doesn’t even want me in bed! — Just goes to sleep, repeat.”
Hmm… that does sound like a really shitty marriage…
Right?!?!?!
Maybe they needed marriage counselling instead of venting to their friends?!
We weren’t even friends… these are just random women who randomly talked about this…
Okay…?!?!?!
There are some women, who even resent the fact that — the husband loves the kids more than they seem to love them?
(Really thinking about this…) I don’t think… that will happen to us…
Why not?
I think… I think I’ll love everyone equally. You and the kids…
Yeah….
But our love still includes the romance, the passion…
Good… that’s also my other fear…
No more romance?
(Nodding)… I fear losing the romance, more than I fear losing the passion…
Why?
I think it’s natural for physical passions to fade as we get older… we’re not supposed to beat ourselves up if we’re not fucking like rabbits into our 50s, 60s, 70s… but the romance… I want the romance… I want date nights, I want to keep that spark alive…
(Smiling) We’ll keep BOTH alive!!!
Yes… but the physical stuff will dwindle down as we age…
Only a little bit — not that much!!!
(Smiles)
Ah?! You’re smiling?! You’re not fearing marriage so much?!?!!
Well… That’s all that I can think of, for now… I’m sure we’ll re-visit this again another day… when I think of something else…
Okay… I don’t mind. Whenever you want to talk about it. It’s not a “heavy” topic to me.
It’s not?!?!!
No?!?! I’m so EXCITED to MARRY YOU!!! I can’t wait!!! I want to talk about ALL your fears, ALL your hesitations. Anything and everything. Let’s get it ALL OUT — before we’re legally married.
(Sigh)… okay… there’s probably still a bit for me to process…
That’s okay. We have until… September, this year…
(Chuckles) — You’re really set on that date now?
(Nodding) I’m not waiting another year. This time next year, we’re married!
(Smiles)… well I suppose it’s always comforting when you’re looking forward to it…
It is?!?!?
Yes… I wouldn’t want to marry a guy who’s like, “Meh. Marriage. Whatever. Whenever” — like, that wouldn’t make me feel very happy or optimistic about marrying him, right?!?!?!
(LOL)… I’m not that guy!
Yeah… you’re definitely not!!! I just need some time… some things are still swirling at the back of my mind… I haven’t put it into words yet…
That’s okay… I love you anyway.
I know. I love you too… xoxoxoxoxxx
Virgo Sun Pisces Moon 