Okay I still have a little bit of time before I have to meet the girls.
(Looking up from his music writing, smiling) Okay?
Baby — I think we’re both… neurodivergent… or semi-neurodivergent…
It’s a spectrum disorder… you’re either on the spectrum or you’re not…
Okay then. I think we’re both ON the spectrum — but on the high-functioning end of it…
(Thinking)… Why do you think this?
Okay. Maybe you’re not… maybe I am…?
You still haven’t answered my question.
I think I’m high-functioning neurodivergent even though the psychologist said that I’m not but I didn’t get a second opinion and there’s many situations where individuals go get a second, third or even fourth or more opinion until finally they get their diagnosis.
So it’s hard to say definitively whether I am or not, with just one psychologist’s opinion.
But I still haven’t gone to get other diagnoses because — in Australia — it wouldn’t really qualify me for NDIS or anything like that anyway because I can go to work, I can “function” — there’s nothing about my neurodivergence that’s actually debilitating to any extremes.
If I have some off days — yes, I need to find healthy ways to cope with it like any other human beings. But I may have some neurodivergence in my cognitive programming, without it being debilitating.
(Nodding) Okay darling… I kind of knew this…
You did? Since when?
Since… probably not too long within the first 24 hours when we met…
How did you come to that conclusion within the first 24 hours?!
(Shrugs shoulders) Just an instinct, I guess…
But you said, “I can’t read your mind” —
That’s WHY — I started thinking about it…
But you didn’t tell me?!
Well… you hadn’t realised it within yourself?
(Pouting)… I went through a lot… over these years… trying to make sense of myself… it hasn’t been easy…
(Nodding) I understand…
That’s why I like the movie “Mozart and the Whale” —
Ahh. Yes I was wondering when you were going to explain it…
Yeah… it’s based on a true story — but in the end they got divorced? But then, they’re still living together?! (Allegedly?! I don’t know for sure?!) But they didn’t want to stay married? Legally? Technically married?
(Nodding)… do you think that’s going to happen to us as well? After we get married, after we go through with the whole circus, we’re just going to realise, “Oh actually — we don’t really want this” — ?
(Deep breaths, contemplating)… No… I don’t think that’s going to happen to us.
Why not?
Because… I think… culturally… I’ve still been raised to be an “Asian wife” — if I’m married, I’m married… you’ve got me… (shrugs shoulders)
(Chuckles) Why are you shrugging your shoulders?! AREN’T YOU LOOKING FORWARD TO IT?!?!?!!?
(Laughing) Yes, yes, darling — I’M LOOKING FORWARD TO IT! But also — yeah, I don’t think I will feel that frustrated with actual marriage. It might even be more calming?
Calming?
Yes… I think I will “settle down” more — literally — in my nerves, my anxieties, my overthinking… especially if we do spend more time together as a married couple… it’s like that psychic message about our sleep — I don’t think it’s only sleep. I think it’s whenever we’re physically around each other. Just holding hands, walking around the shops, anything — any time spent together. I think it’ll be calming for me… and maybe… keeping my neurodivergent tendencies at bay… maybe…
(Nodding, smiling) — I think so too. I don’t think it was possible… back then… with Trainwreck… but me, now — mature, millennial man — yes. I feel very confident about this next phase.
(Smiling, hugs and cuddles)
…
…
…
Do you think you’re neurodivergent?
(Shaking his head) No… I think you just think I am because neurodivergent people tend to think everyone else is thinking “like them” but we’re actually not…
(Laughing) So… you’re neurotypical?!?!!
(Nodding) Yes…
You don’t have MDPD?!?!!
(Laughing) No… I’m just a good actor — I can ACT — there’s many CHARACTERS to ACT with…
Oh…. what about ADHD? Or any other diagnoses?!?!
(Shrugs shoulders)… I don’t think so… but I could ask a professional one day… you could come sit in the consult with me…
Really? You’re willing to let me sit in?
(Nodding) Sure… why not? When you’re my wife?! You get to take notes, keep track… file it all away for me…
Oh… because I have a healthcare background, that’s why you want to marry me?!
(Smirk) I think we’ve already been over this… it’s not the ONLY reason… there’s never just ONE reason…
Okay fine… (Smiling)
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox
Virgo Sun Pisces Moon 