How many lawyers are coming to our wedding?
I don’t know… one? As far as I can immediately think of…?
One lawyer?
Yes, my high school friend…
High school friend who’s a lawyer… so… a girl? A woman?
(Nodding) Yes…
That’s all?
Well — I don’t actually stalk all my networks’ LinkedIns, I don’t know who the fuck else got themselves a lawyer qualification recently!? Maybe there’ll technically be more than one on the actual day?!?!?!
Okay — no other close lawyer friends, other than a high school friend, from the all girls’ school.
(Nodding) Yes… you’re being weird about this…
Am I?! Am “I” the one being WEIRD about… “this”…?!?!?!!
What do you want to ask me?
Well — perhaps I’ve been chatting to the mutual friends. Perhaps there were other lawyer MALES in your past?!?!
And what if there was?
They’re not invited to the wedding?
Nope. Also — THERE WASN’T.
What do you mean…
One was a crush. That had soooooooooo many other girls had a crush on him. The other was — platonic. Purely platonic from my end.
Hmm… I’m not sure if I fully believe you…
Oh?!?!!? Really?!?!?!!?!?
Well… I don’t know… there seems to be… mixed narratives… even the mutual friends don’t have their stories straight.
Everybody was DRUNK. Who the fuck knows. The point is — we’re in our late-30s now. They’re all married. They’re not invited to our wedding.
Okay…
Okay?! Are you sure?
Well —
Do you need a hug?
(Nodding) Yes…
(BIIIIIG HUGSSSSSSSS) (Kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss)
Virgo Sun Pisces Moon 