Who’s on the International Friends guest list?
What the FUCK? How the FUCK do I talk about them on a public blog?!
Just try, baby… just try…
(Thinking… deep breaths)…
…
…
…
- VW Golf
- Melbourne Grammar — (All of them?! — Yep. I don’t think they’re all gonna come but they’re welcome if they want to, or send a video message or something like that, I don’t know…)
- Malaysians — (LOLOLOLOL — JUST A BLANKET TERM?!! “MALAYSIANS” ?!?!?! — LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL……… They know who they are!)
ALL of them?! ALL MALAYSIANS ARE INVITED TO OUR WEDDING?!?!?!!?
(Cackling)… All the Malaysians of OUR MUTUAL FRIENDS!!!
Okay… (LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL)
Singaporeans?!?!?!
I can’t think of any…
Hmm.. interesting…
- Londoners
Which Londoners?
All of them.
ALL LONDENERS ARE INVITED TO OUR WEDDING?!?!?!!?!?
(Laughing) Okay… how do I say this… maybe 2 of them…
Right… who?!
Past housemates. Past housemates are definitely invited. Even a Singaporean one. Oh yeah. Forgot about her…
Oh… past housemates…
The Malaysian mutual friends can help you contact them.
Oh?
And then just extend that to the Media girls, even the one who married the guy from China — via mutual friends, via Media girls in general — Media girls in general know THAT other Media Girl who married the Chinese man.
Right… okay… (Writing this down)…
Maybe even Melbourne Grammar knows if they think, really, really really really REALLY HARD about it… who used to be in class with us?! The Media Girls — there’s one face… they should know… they should know her face… she was always in class with us. That’s how we’re friends.
Oh? Okay…
I think you’ll be surprised which Melbourne Grammar remembers.
Oh? Why?
Because they just sometimes — have the most random memory about things that people don’t expect them to remember!
(Chuckles)
Have I forgotten anyone?
I don’t know, have you?
Hmm… There are other… Media friends…
HOW MANY FRIENDS IN THE GLOBAL MEDIA INDUSTRY DO YOU HAVE?!?!?!!?!?!?
(LOL)… I don’t know if they’re working IN the industry… anymore… but… we were all at Melbourne Uni… we studied Media and Communications… yeah, we did that…
Okay, which other Media friends?
There is… one Indonesian Leo… and a Melbournian Leo…
What the fuck……………… HOW ARE WE SUPPOSED TO KNOW WHO THEY ARE?!?!?!
You’ll find them. I trust the mutual friends, the Media girls — they’ll know who I’m talking about.
Why them?
They’re friends, too.
You haven’t spoken to them for ages?!
Mmm… well… Melbournian Leo is on my Instagram friends. Indonesian Leo I haven’t spoken to for a long time…
Why is this friend important?
They were… on the peripheries of the mutual friends group… They know this person. They’ll know how to contact them for an invitation. I don’t know if they’ll show up. I don’t mind, either way. But I feel — in my heart — there should be an invitation sent out.
Text from International Mutual Friends:
Holy FUCK! We just realised your personalities are really, really similar!!!
Who?! Who’s personalities?!?!!?
International Friends:
YOU! Common Name! And the Indonesian Media Friend!!! YOU BOTH ARE SOOO SIMILAR! LIKE 95% SIMILAR. THERE WAS ONLY EVER A 5% DIFFERENCE. HOLYYYY FUCK!!!
What?!
(Nodding) (Thinking about this)… (Processing)… Yeah… maybe… it feels kinda true, actually…
Were you ever together?
Nope.
Just friends?
(Nodding)
Are the mutual friends going to tell me more about this person?!
Even your older brother can tell you more about this person. Yes. They know this person.
Boy or Girl?
That’s not information for the public blog.
(Deep breaths)
International Friends:
What about the friends from Japan?
The ones who are already living in Australia, yes, please invite them. The ones who are living in Japan — we can go visit them when we’re in Japan, and just have a small friends’ dinner.
(Nodding) I like that…
Yeah. It’ll be nice.
I’m still kinda tripped up about the 95% similarity with that other friend…
Yeah…
What would’ve happened?
I don’t think they had romantic intentions about me…?
But what if? Hypothetically?
I have no idea… I’d be living in Indonesia?!?!?!!
Right… interesting… 95% — ???
Maybe… maybe more like… 98%….?
WHAT??!?!?!?!?!!?! 98% SIMILARITY AND YET YOU WERE JUST FRIENDS AND IF THEY HAD ROMANTIC INTENTIONS YOU’D BE LIVING IN INDONESIA RIGHT NOW?!?!?
See they used shout like this as well…
International Friends:
(Nodding) They did… they used to have shouting matches as well…
(Stunned… still processing)… Do I… want to meet them?
Maybe if we go to Bali one day or some other parts of Indonesia — maybe we could catch up… I’m not even sure if they’re married right now. I honestly don’t know much…
International Friends:
They’re net worth is more than yours. In case you’re wondering.
What!?!?!
International Friends:
Yeah. You as a genre star. You don’t make shit compared to the Indonesian… (LOLOLOLOLOLOL)
(Cackling) I know which friend specifically said that…
(LOL) Which one?!?!?!?
Sigh… They’re a teddy bear… a kiwi fruit… or bananas or pineapples I don’t even know anymore… (LOLOLOLOL)
So… you and me… instead of… an Indonesian…? Possibly?
No. It’s not possibly. You were just asking hypotheticals. They were always JUST. FRIENDS. Like siblings.
Oh… fuck………………….
What?!?!?!?!
It’s never “just… friends”……………….
Yes…… in that situation, it was… really…..
International Friends:
Maybe. Yeah. Oddly enough. Really, really like siblings. Actual siblings. Not romantic siblings. Yeah. That’s the 5% or 2% difference.
(Nodding) Real siblings…
Really?
International Friends:
YES!
(Nodding) Very much, like real siblings… maybe 95% or even 98% is far too high. Maybe it’s more like 90%… we were all being dramatic.
Oh… 90% similarities…
Yeah… maybe… why don’t you decide for yourself if we go to Indonesia and meet them one day? With other mutual friends?
Okay… you don’t think they’re coming to the wedding?
International Friends:
They would need to helicopter in. It’s too much of a hassle these days.
(Chuckling in bewilderment!!!)
(Shrugs shoulders) This is all fiction… such an amusing fictional blog…
Virgo Sun Pisces Moon 