Bro A: I’m following you guys into the cinemas with a water spray gun. You’re not getting her pregnant in those cinemas!
Husband: It’s not possible?! We’re not going to do anything! It’s a public place! It’s the cinemas!
Bro A: Oh… you never know, that sperm could just leak through the fabric and into her vagina, even in a cinemas! I don’t trust you two. I’m following you both in with a water spray gun! As soon as I see you kissing her, I’m spraying!!!
Husband: (Laughing) I think everyone is being a little dramatic. We’re GROWN. MILLENNIALS. We’re gonna CONTROL OURSELVES.
Bro B: (Laughing) No you’re not!
Bro C: Agree. Maybe she can… but… you can’t! (LOLOLOLOLOLOL)
Bro D: What about the hotel next to the shopping centre? What if you two just sneak away there without our knowledge? Maybe we should send some staff to that hotel lobby to make sure the two of you never go in?!!?
Husband: Okay now you’re ALL being paranoid! We’re not going to “sneak into a hotel” — it’s not like that. Okay, also — even if we wanted to — what are you going to do?! Send staff to every single hotel lobby on the Gold Coast?! There’s so many of them all along the coast! It wouldn’t be hard to find a hotel room — if we really wanted to.
This is getting ridiculous! Everyone should just shut up and trust me!!!
All Bros Together: We DON’T. We trust HER…?! We can trust HER to keep herself DEMURE — but we don’t trust YOU!!! Not. AT. ALL!!!
Husband: (Blushing, laughing, can’t believe the betrayal!)
Bros to Each Other: We need to take turns. One of us has to spy on them. While they’re dating. We have to… have a water spray gun… prepared, just in case. We need to take turns to mind them. Every trip he takes — back to Gold Coast — we need to take turns to follow him and make sure he doesn’t get her pregnant.
Husband: FUCK… YOUS… ALL….. (Laughing and giving them all the middle finger)
TEXT FROM WIFEY:
It’s okay, dear!!! It’s only in the INITIAL STAGES… they’re not following us forever!!! To be honest, I’ll feel more pace of mind with that as well… as long as they don’t get TOO close — I mean, sometimes, I wouldn’t mind, actually meeting them?! As your FRIENDS?! How cool is that?! But initially — fine, let them follow from a safe distance… we’re still just re-acquainting… especially first half of 2025… you have your World Tour. I do want to respect that. Not just for you — for your FANS — I don’t want to let them down, either. I don’t want to be another woman “blamed” for anything out of my own control.
Virgo Sun Pisces Moon 