,

Embarrassing

Friend 1: “That was… the most awkward movie I’ve ever had to sit through.”

Other friends — huge bursts of laughter.

Me: “What?! I’m sorry! Geez. We won’t do it ever again.”

Friend 2: “Do you know?! His older brother, was tapping him on the shoulder, and he kept ignoring him. And then, he literally yanked on his neck LIKE A CAT (more laughing, there was a whole other laugh in the explanation too, I just couldn’t type it out)… just to be able to… (laughing, can’t stop) pull him OFF of YOU…. (laughing more)….”

Friend 1: (Joining in the laughter, mimicking) “Like, GET… OFF… HER!!!!!!!”

Friend 2: (Still laughing) “We needed a spray gun. Like cold water or something!!!”

Me: “What?! Like a cat? Oh, you mean, like a kitten? Like how mother cats grab their necks?”

Friends: “YES!!!!!” (Still laughing)

Friend 2: “You were MOANING” (eyes so big — Didn’t know you had that in you!)

Friend 1: “Oh, please, don’t remind me…” (shaking her head — IT WAS SO AWKWARD!)

Me: “WHAT?!?!?!?!”

Friends: “It was SO EMBARASSING. We thought we were going to get kicked out of the cinemas!”

Me — frozen in fear — I was embarrassing. That’s a disgrace to my parents. I lost face. That’s not good… maybe… maybe he’s not good for me…

Me Now…

It’s fine… just young love… there’s nothing to be embarrassed about.

We could do it again (cheeky grin).

We could recreate it one day. A better way.

I’ll control my sounds… we won’t be embarrassed.

There’s nothing to be embarrassed about.

I want to love you proudly.